"I'd Be Building My Kingdom Just to Watch it Fade Away"

Good morning!  I can't believe there are many weeks I only write once.  I mean, I suppose in all reality that once is plenty, but I find myself thinking about little things I can post here and there, then don't, so they just add up into one really long post that no one even has the time to read! So, my goal is to write shorter tidbits so our family can check in on us without being burdened by a novel.

But, since it's been over a week, there is quite a bit I could write about.  Carly has done a couple of really silly things week...some big some small.

1.  I have to set this one up:  for months now, Carly has taken a nap about an hour before getting ready for bed.  Because she only takes half hour naps, this seems to work out.  She is up for 45 minutes to an hour and then we are already starting our bedtime routine.  So, a few weeks ago we decided to do her bedtime routine at that nap, hoping to just change her bedtime.  She woke up 31 minutes later.  So....one night this week we put her down for her last nap and she didn't wake up 30 minutes later.  She didn't wake up an hour later.  After two hours had passed we pretty much decided she was out for the night so we went to bed.  I slept terrible that night, worried that she wasn't in her comfy pajamas, worried that the blanket I put on her to keep her warm in her t-shirt and skirt would get in the way and worried about her diaper that was already a bit full when we put her down for her nap.  I kept waking up in the night to check on her...wondering why she hadn't woke up yet.  Guess what times she woke up? 6am!  She slept soundly for 11 hours and went without eating for 13!  She was HUNGRY when she did finally wake up.  Anyway...it hasn't continued throughout the rest of the week, but it was pretty silly.
2. She unbuckled the top part of her car seat strap!  Good thing the bottom part is impossible to get undone!
3. She LOVES to eat paper...she will find it and eat it and enjoy it for quite a while.
4. Her strong love for music continues to show itself in funny ways.  This week when we've been driving in the car and one song ends and the gap before the next song happens, Carly gets fussy, saying, "wait, wait, wait, where did my music go...I still want it on...don't turn it off!!"  And then quiets right back down as soon as she hears the next song.  What's really funny about this is my mom has told me stories that I did the exact same thing when I was little.  Pretty sweet.
5. She LOVES the song referenced in the title of this blog.  It's kind of a cheesy song but it comes on the radio quite a bit and one day I got it stuck in my head and was singing it around the house and Carly was laughing SO hard.  It was the hardest I'd ever heard her laugh.  She did it again when Brian got home from work and now giggles every time I sing that song.  

 We've had a great week, but really, what day isn't great when I'm hanging out with my favorite girl.  I pretty much dread going to work each day and wish I wasn't working 30 hours a week (20 would be way better), but Brian and I crunched the numbers the other day and I contribute more than I thought I did...especially after insurance is deducted from his pay check.  But that point brings me to the other reason I chose this title for the blog.

Now that my identity is largely tied to Carly, I'm having some difficulty separating from that and figuring out who I'm suppose to be.  I get asked to work full time at least once a week, so a part of me gets pulled in that direction.  I'd really like to be on worship team at church, but that takes more time away from home as rehearsal is on the only day we get as a family.  I'd like to start getting involved in more community activities, I want to consistently be going for runs, working out, etc., I'd love to have my house be spotless (I did some deep cleaning this week and it felt awesome), I'd like to take up sewing so I can make Carly super cute things, I'd like to re-decorate the house, I'd like to be more creative with meals rather than whipping something up fast (at least I get dinner on the table most nights), I'd like to look "pretty" again, and I'd love to sit out on my chair and soak up God's word in daily uninterrupted devotional time.  So, if anyone can please give me advice on how I can be super-mom and get all these things done that would be much appreciated!  Life is largely defined by balance and expectations, neither of which are in line for me.  Why isn't pouring myself fully into Carly enough? Why do I feel guilty when all I've done is play with her all day and gotten nothing else accomplished. If my "kingdom" (purpose) is to be a loving wife and mother, why don't I find that fulfilling?  What is my purpose in this stage of life and how to I build upon that?  Again, I need some teaching from all my super-mom friends out there!

I tell you what, being a mother has exposed my weaknesses far more than any other period of my life.  Some say that getting married is sanctifying, that it shows you just how sinful we are, but being married was pretty easy for us.  My sanctification came the day I started spilling my insides when I began carrying my child.  I am so weak and I fall on my Heavenly Father way more than I ever have.  My entire labor I just kept singing in my head, "You are my strength when I am weak, You are my strength when I am weak..."  I don't think I've stopped singing those words.  Christ is teaching me to surrender my whole self.  It's a good lesson to learn, and not the first time I've learned it.  Life is pretty great if you look at the list of things that have gone just perfectly for us, but there is an internal battle I fight trying to build a kingdom that wont fade away. 

"Sunday, Monday, Happy Days"

I will let you decide for yourself how Carly is feeling based on what we've captured the past few days:

Yep, she is healthy and overall happy and enjoying trying to walk along the furniture. 

She begs to play at her music table...when we are walking past it she attempts to lunge out of our arms toward it.  So, here is what we have spent hours doing since she started feeling better:

Still no luck with food...but we keep trying! Yesterday she had slight interest in some oatmeal made with her milk, but would not have her green beans.  She will take 4 bites every single time and then go bonkers.  Kind of funny.  She's been sleeping better which is also a refreshing break from the past two weeks of middle of the night feedings.

Today was once again, the day we look forward to each week: our family day.  We ate at Olivia's (we ate there last month with my Mom and Grammy) and I think every person in the restaurant came up to meet Carly, who was happily playing with my french fries while sitting on the table.  I swear she catches everyone's eye.  Carly and I went to two parks this week, once with friends and once with daddy, and both times I must have heard, "oh she is so sweet/cute/precious/adorable/happy/etc" fifty different times.  I think it's that smile that she flashes that gets her so many looks.  She really will smile at anyone who smiles at her.  I hope she's always that outgoing! After lunch we headed to EPCOT where we stopped at the American Pavilion to watch Fife & Drummers and then the Voices of Liberty.  Check out the video of Carly dancing to the music!

The singers loved watching her and came up to us after the show to comment on her keeping beat with them.  One lady swooped her right up (which as Cast Members we actually aren't suppose to do...lol)!

We had a lovely time together, as usual.  Someday we will get two days as a family and we wont take it for granted!  That's enough for tonight...my little girl has been sleeping for two hours and I close tomorrow then open the next day so it's time to get some rest!  But before I go...could she smile any bigger?!?!

"She's My Kind of Rain" {7 Months}

Carly turned 7 months old last week and has been sick ever since!  With her second trip to Iowa leading up to the 7 month mark, she was quite busy...so I didn't get a chance to post or take her 7 month photos, for that matter.

Truth be told it's been a very stressful couple of weeks with multiple changes...so I wish I could write all about the normalcy in Carly's life, but sadly it doesn't exist.  She was right on track toward being the "world's coolest 7-month old" when she encountered a road block of being sick.  So we have degressed in the past two weeks, but that's okay.

So...before we went to Iowa, here is what I would have said about our girl:

• Eats like a champ, downing 5 ounces in total of "solids" twice a day
• Loves sweet potatoes, peas and carrots and will eat avocado,green beans and oatmeal  if in the right mood
• Can stand for periods of minutes at a time while playing with her music table
• Transitions from sitting to the crawling position and then lunges forward
• Is becoming the happiest little girl around.  Brian and I have texted frequently that she is just an angel when she is with us!

And here is my report now that she has gone through a bad cold, cough, ear infection, bloody noses, and a head-to-toe rash:

• Does not go into the crawling position and gets frustrated when she can't get to a toy she wants 
• Has rejected all solid food and will gag to the point of vomit when we feed her
• Due to her lack of nutrition throughout the day, wakes up around 1am-2am for a feeding...I'm so glad we have gone back to night time feedings! NOT!  I pray each night as I'm getting into bed that she will sleep through the night...but it hasn't happened since our first night in Iowa
• Is very clingy, squirmy and needy...but all natural parts of being a sick baby

Anyway, here is really what she has developed this month:

•  Can actually pull herself up from the sitting position to her music table without loosing her balance...crazy!
• Experimenting with her vocal chords and can get very loud.  She grunts, giggles, screeches, screams, sings and talks...you name it, she vocalizes it!
• Loves...just loves to read books!  
• Loves the predictable and the familiar...we read the same books and sing the same songs over and over again.  She knows what parts of her books are soft to touch and knows how to turn the page
• Freaks out when music is played...seriously goes bonkers.  This girl LOVES music, especially harmonies.
• Understands routine but is also a very flexible little girl
• Incredibly demanding but a doll when she gets what she wants
• Responds positively to praise and encouragement--praise God that we have 5 more months before we have to start discipline! 

Her schedule is as follows:

Oh, wait...she doesn't have one!  HA!  I've been pulling my hair out the past 6 months trying to instill a schedule that she did not want to follow.  So shortly after I posted her 6 month blog, I tossed my hands in the air and decided to just do whatever she wanted to do.  Many child-directed method books say that if babies are allowed to function on their own schedule that it will fall into place and become predictable, but that is not the case with Carly.  No two days are the same...even similar.  Some days she takes 3 naps, most days she takes 4 naps and some times she takes 5 naps (each nap only lasting 30 minutes).  She also nurses a minimum of 5 times per day but sometimes nurses 7 times in a 24-hour period (which is crazy for a 7-month old to still be nursing that often...I'm never going to get this girl weened [which actually is totally okay with me]!).  The only thing predictable is that somehow each night we get her to bed by 9 or 9:15pm and she will generally take a nap 2 hours after she gets up in the morning.  Every other awake time and nap time is unpredictable.  Some days she is up at 7am and other times she sleeps until 9:30am (with me, of course).  I can also bank on her joining me in bed each morning between 5:30am-6:30am.  I don't know any other baby who wasn't on a schedule by 7 months old...so if you can relate do share in my woes! ;)

It's okay...I love her for who she is and have accepted that despite my best efforts this particular child is a bit complicated.  Maybe I'll get a mild-mannered kid next time around...but this little girl happens to be as stubborn as her mama.  I look forward to directing that strong willed nature into good and productive matters someday.

Well I'd say that just about covers this crazy month called number 7.  I can't wait to see what's next!

Look how long she is!  Those legs are nearly hanging off the edge!

 This last one I have to post because it shows just how much she dislikes being on her back.  She will roll over immediately if you place her on her back so she can scoot around on her tummy! :)

"Home Again, Home Again, Jiggity Jig"

I have debated how I want to present our trip to Iowa for two reasons.  One, in six days we did a lot and took a ton of pictures, so I thought about writing a few different posts about it.  Two, the title of this blog refers to a place called home.  On the one hand we were in Iowa, a place that was home for 22 years of our lives.  On the other hand, however, this was the first time that we told people we were going to "Iowa for a visit" rather than, "going home."  It was also the first trip that we said to each other on the flight back to Florida that we were ready to get "home."  Home is in Florida...and as we head into our 3rd fall and holiday season here, I've been reflecting on that quite a bit.

At any rate...this will be a long post...but that's okay.

Day 1:

Landed in Des Moines and arrived at my Grandma's house, Carly's Mimi, where she had an entire lunch spread out for our hungry bellies!  The trip there went as smooth as it could have gone!  Carly woke up right as we were ready to get her into the car, had a bottle on the way to the airport, napped on both flights and was happy as a clam to be hanging with mommy and daddy for a 9-hour en route trip.  She rode on her 3rd and 4th planes.

Carly got lots of loving upon her arrival.  She was bit caught off guard but went with the flow fairly well.

Wednesday evening Mimi prepared a delicious dinner for the Stubbs family, we met my brother's girlfriend, Mia, for the first time and Carly ate watermelon in a high chair for the first time. 

Day 2:

Got up and had a delicious breakfast of eggs and sausage made by Mimi, headed to Ankeny for an eye exam and a walk with my friend, Carley, in the freezing 60 degree weather.  My eyes have actually improved this year, which is fairly common with pregnancy.  Since getting my new prescription I've had less headaches and can read street signs!  Yay!

Lindsay and her son, Eli, joined us for an afternoon play date.  Eli is a joy to be around and Carly couldn't keep her eyes off him! Lindsay is "super-mom" in my book and we are excited to meet Eli's little brother the next time we are in town.

After the Gerbers left, we met Brian's family in Ankeny for some delicious HuHot, but first stopped to play at a park.  I think it's safe to say Carly loves the park!  Check out her first slide ride, as well!

Day 3:

Monkey bread for breakfast...one of my favorite treats!! I decided before heading to Iowa that I wasn't going to even try being on a diet for those six days so I went all out! After filling my belly with deliciousness, we arrived at my Nana's house for some 5 generation quality time. 

What an absolute blessing for Carly to get to spend time with her great, great grandma.  I think they are 97 years a part. 

We had pizza with Nana, Grandma, my parents and Anna, then headed back to Grandma's house where we were joined by Trey, and later by my uncle Dave and his family.  It was nice to just hang low with family and friends.

 Day 4:

If you know Brian and I, you know we are huge sports fans and very loyal Iowa State fans at that!  Saturday Brian was in a wedding, so he didn't get to partake in all the festivities of tailgating like I did, but at least he got to catch the second half of the game!  We spent the morning at Mimi's house where Carly got to wake up Uncle Trey in the wee hours of the morning...

...and were visited by Shayla and her kids, JT, Emmie and baby Zola!  The girls really loved exploring one another.  Shayla's 4th baby is due in just two weeks, so Carly will grow up having two second cousins born in the same year as her!

Sisters? ;)

Watching Carly and Zola was hilarious....

We said our goodbyes and headed to Ames for some tailgating!  It was fun seeing many friends and walking my daughter around my old stomping grounds!  I look forward to a day that Brian and I can buy season tickets again!

Carly went to her very first football game and then went with Grandpa and Nana to she could go to sleep.  Her first time being put to bed by someone other than us was a success!  However, we were up all night taking care of a very sick little girl...and so began a very long week.  More on that later.

My favorite picture of the trip!

 Day 5:

Church at E.Free in the morning and off to Grandpa and Grandma Weiss' house for lunch with them and Uncle Nathan.  We were joined in the afternoon by Brian's Aunt Paula and her son Jacob, who is a freshman at ISU.  Grandpa and Grandma put up their swing in the backyard for Carly's enjoyment.

 I escaped for a couple of hours to see a group of dear girlfriends, two of which had JUST had babies the week before.  This group of girls I've been friends with since college, and in 4 years we have added EIGHT littles to the picture.  I don't think there will ever be a trip where I don't see these ladies for at least a few hours and look forward to a day we can re-integrate ourselves into their lives again.

Carly's godparents, Chris and Nikki came to visit us in the evening and we had a marvelous time catching up with them.  I think they need to give Carly a little godsister or godbrother in the very near future? ;)

 Great Planes for dinner, a walk with the G'parents and some snuggles in the evening completed that day.

Day 6:

Another rough night, but joy always comes in the morning.  It's so hard having a sick babe.  We took a walk on campus with Uncle Trey in the morning and got our "classic" family pic by Campanile! 

Picked up Jimmy Johns for lunch and headed to the Loecke's to see our friends, Jessica, Zachary and Mae.  We were so sad we missed Eliza, but 6 days is just too short to see everyone.  I started babysitting Eliza before Zachary was even born...so it's strange to see him as a preschooler!  Jessica has been a big blessing in my life and always gives me great wisdom and support when I have questions about Carly.

Grandma came home early from school to get extra play time with Carly who decided to take a record-breaking two and a half hour nap! But soon enough she was awake and got lots of play time before heading in for the night, and for the trip.

 Day 7:

TRAVEL DAY.  We went to Des Moines to see my parents "new place" and then it was to Walgreens to get Saline and Tylenol for Carly and off on a very long endeavor home full of little delays along the way...finally reaching our front door after 2am.  At least Carly slept most of the second plane ride since we were delayed so late into the evening.  Carly rode on her 5th and 6th planes (can you tell I'm keeping track of how many planes our little traveler has been on?)

Another trip to Iowa complete.  Next time we visit Carly will be 13 months old!